It’s Official: Cheerios Best Sacrament Meeting Snack

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Cheerios for LDS Sacrament meeting graphic title

 

It’s time to get ready for a toddler-filled sacrament meeting. What distracting sacrament meeting snacks should you pack?

Well, MormonHub provides. We’ve got your completely biased one-man definitive answer.

We’ve scored the most popular snack options on how noisy, messy, healthy, and easy they are to get ready. Here’s your list of the best sacrament meeting snack.

And be sure to head down to the comments and let us know what perfect snack solution we’ve forgotten.

10. Cookies

cookies

Are cookies really the worst sacrament meeting snack? Yes. And you know in your heart it’s true. No snack this tasty could really be the best.

Noise: 8 Quiet to break, quiet to chew, and if you get going on them for a bit they can keep the kids quiet.

Mess: 2 When a cookie breaks, the crumbs shoot directly for the deepest crevice in the chapel carpet.

Prep/Cost: 5 Cookies require virtually no prep time. But they’re one of the priciest options on the list. Or you make them and they require tons of prep.

Health: 1 Here’s where it really falls apart for our friend the cookie. When equally delicious options are so much better for you, it just doesn’t have a chance.

Avg: 4 Pass on the cookie, your wallet and gut will thank you.

9. Goldfish Crackers

goldfish

It pains me to put Goldfish so far down the list since they are a personal favorite. But completely arbitrary numbers don’t lie.

Noise: 7 A little crunchier than cookies makes them lose a point here, but overall Goldfish are solid on the noise scale

Mess: 2 The only thing keeping Goldfish from a one is that you can stuff the whole thing in your mouth. But if it ever breaks up—good luck. Not only are they impossible to clean, even the sleeping high councilor on the stand can see the neon orange mess they leave.

Prep/Cost: 4 This is a pricey cracker. If you’ve got to go Goldfish, at least go for the ripoffs, whales or penguins or whatever.

Health: 5 Goldfish are not outright offensive to your health like some of the options, but certainly not helpful either.

Avg: 4.5 If your toddler has never ever made a mess, then you might consider Goldfish. Otherwise, pass.

8. Pretzels

pretzels

Does anyone eat pretzels anymore? Well if you were considering it, you can stop now, they just fail in too sacrament-snack-related ways.

Noise: 6 This crunchy snack shouldn’t be too bad as long as your kids eat with their mouths closed. But many modern pretzels come packaged little noise makers.

Mess: 5 The mess here is not quite at cracker-bad levels, but hard pretzels can get dusty.

Prep/Cost: 6 Do I have any idea how much pretzels cost? No. Do I have any intention of finding out? Not unless the prophet says we need to start stockpiling.

Health: 2 These are just stealth chips, right?

Avg: 4.75 If I’m completely wrong about how expensive pretzels are, then they might make a stealthy good option.

7. Fruit Snacks

fruit-snacks

From peeking around my chapel on Sunday, these blissful drops of fruit-inspired sugar seem to be gaining popularity. But maybe they shouldn’t be.

Noise: 7 These gooey monstrosities will glue your children’s mouths shut. But only after they’ve fiddled through those crinkly packages.

Mess: 6 The likelihood that a fruit snack makes a mess is low. If it falls you can just pick it up. Which keeps the score from getting too low. But if you accidentally step on one, not even the vacuum can help you.

Prep/Cost: 3 Does a pack of fruit snacks cost more than cookies? Maybe not. But you get so many more cookies. Cost to deliciousness ratio just doesn’t stand up. They are super easy to pack though.

Health: 3 I mean, they’re not cookie bad, but don’t let the word fruit fool you.

Avg: 4.75 The silence alone makes these tempting, but press on, we can do better.

6. Granola Bar

granola-bars

The granola bar feels more like a meal replacement than an on-the-go snack. But maybe your kid needs something more substantial

Noise: 8 This is assuming you haven’t bought those granola bricks which pop every time you take a bite. Otherwise these are a nice quiet supple option.

Mess: 3 The granola bar mess comes out in chunks, so it’s easy to clean. But stray oats always slip out when you open a package. Always.

Prep/Cost: 4 Super easy. Oddly expensive.

Health: 5 This really just depends on your granola bar of choice. Double-chocolate dipped, chocolate chip granola bars do not get a 5 on health.

Avg: 5 If you make your own, or your kids need something more substantial during sacrament this could be the answer for you.

5. LifeSavers

lifesavers

No offense to Jolly Ranchers, this could really be a stand in for all hard candy.

Noise: 6 What is it about LifeSaver packages that make so much noise. Unwrapping one draws the bending head like few other things on Earth. Big pro though, kids can’t talk while sucking on a LifeSaver.

Mess: 9 The wrapper is the only thing keeping this from a perfect ten.

Prep/Cost: 6 If you value shop, you can get a gallon drum of these at Costco.

Health: 1 We all admit candy is the definition of unhealthy, right?

Avg: 5.5 Probably better for older kids who aren’t going to be hit by a sugar rush in the middle of the intermediate hymn

4. Carrot Sticks

carrot-sticks

Loved by rabbits, do carrot sticks stack up as a toddler snack? They’re not bad, but I mean your desire to actually eat them has to count for something, right?

Noise: 2 Carrot sticks admittedly have a little crunch. But why so low? Because of all the noise your children will make complaining that you’ve brought carrot sticks for them to snack on.

Mess: 9 Carrots snap almost perfectly clean. Hard to argue.

Prep/Cost: 6 Cheap to buy, and if you’re willing to put out a bit more for the baby carrots, you don’t even have to cut them up.

Health: 10 I mean they are healthy. You have to give them that.

Avg: 6.75 The carrot stick is the refuge for parents worried about what people will think about them in public. No need to worry about judgmental eyes on this one.

3. Apple Slices

apple-slices

Carrot’s definitely better-tasting cousin.

Noise: 7 An even smaller crunch than the carrot, but you really win by losing all the complaining.

Mess: 9 Apple slices are a solid performer on the mess scale. But since you’ll almost have to pack them in lemon juice some might slosh out.

Prep/Cost: 3 Here’s where apples really struggle. If you want apples you simply need to find the time to cut them yourself.

Health: 10 All the benefits of a carrot without the bitter aftertaste.

Avg: 7.25 When it comes to apple slices, you need to ask yourself if you’ve got time to actually cut up apples before church. A perfect option for afternoon sacrament, or those with apple slicers.

2. Grapesgrapes

You already know that grapes are the undisputed kings of fruit. But does that success translate to sacrament meeting?

Noise: 9 No crunch, no wrapper, no complaining. Grapes are definitely the most silent of snacks.

Mess: 4 The one thing keeping the grape from sacrament snack greatness is the tragedy that occurs when a grape gets smushed.

Prep/Cost: 7 Grapes are not as cheap as other produce, but compare it to the cookies and all of a sudden the price starts to look better, especially if you can grab them in season.

Health: 10 Produce is hard to beat on health.

Avg: 7.25 Looking around, grapes are tragically underused. This snack is a solid performer. True the potential mess means you’ve got to stay vigilant, but that’s a small price for grape’s other benefits.

1. Cheerios

cheerios

And here we are. We’ve climbed the mountain of inferior snack options and arrived at the best.

Noise: 8 The crunch is minor, and there are no crunchy wrappers to worry about.

Mess: 7 Cheerios are small enough that you won’t have to break them apart, and if one falls its easy to pick up. And if you step on it, it’s bad, but not grape bad.

Prep/Cost: 8 Since you’ll probably be getting these from a big box, you’ll have to do some minor packing. Overall easy and cheap.

Health: 8 True, Cheerios can’t reach the health heights of actual natural produce, but they’re not bad. This can also change significantly depending on if you choose original or frosted.

Avg: 7.75 The undisputed champ. A solid performer in all categories. Apparently, parents have known exactly what they were doing all these years carting Cheerios off to sacrament by the handful.

Christopher D. Cunningham is the managing editor for Public Square Magazine and contributor to Third Hour. He loves emphatically celebrating the normal healthy development of his sons Albus and Whitman, writing about the Church of Jesus Christ, finding the middle ground on most controversies, and using Western Family generic brand lip balm. Christopher is a proud graduate of Brigham Young University-Idaho, and a resident of San Antonio, Texas.