mgridle

I get some things are filter skipping but does rat's patootie count?

That's a pretty good project-congrats to the boy. I hate the projects that basically amount to a book drive or a blood drive . . . big deal-that's simple and no real lasting impact.

I know, I can never get things right in today's society of who is supposed to be the bad guy. Originally I thought men were the bad guys and we had to keep men and women separate b/c men would pray upon innocent young women (#metoo!), but then I thought women were so powerful and "strong" women that they can do anything and don't need a man's help (don't open the door for me), then I thought oh men and women are completely equal so a man can claim to be a woman compete in a woman's sport beat the snot out of the woman and it should be totally cool, then I thought well don't we have separate genders in sports to help women . . . I'm just all confused, silly me, I just need to "get with" whatever identity politics, group I'm supposed to hate that has too much privelege of the day.

At least someone understands. The real split occurred when BSA allowed open homosexuals in-that was when the decision was really made. The PC crowd and maybe even the Church's PR department won't admit it. But that was the exact moment when this was destined to happen. It just took 4-5 years for the rest of the membership to actually want the Church to split from BSA.

Agreed. Now b/c you introduce girls and women into the organization that means you will have women scoutmasters, you will have women in the leadership roles at the top of BSA, now woman's "issues" (whatever that means) will be taken into account. For example the backpacker merit badge requires a 50miler in a short amount of time. Eventually the requirements to be Eagle will be watered down and additional merit badges will be created to take into account girls interest. It will no longer be "scouting.

This! It was the core of scouting. The leaders are there to guide, direct, provide inputs, encourage, set standards, but it was a "boy lead and run" program! Man, it taught so, so much. RIP BSA of old. . . .Unfortunately much of Utah culture went from develop character to let's make everyone a winner! BSA went from Character Counts in '97 at the National Jamboree to let's let in transgenders in 2017-twenty years man, that was it.

No, you don't understand kids . . .I guess you think Adam had a funky relationship with God.

To each his own; I never said to not hold them accountable at all-never suggested. I just said I wouldn't reveal my sources; kids are going to try and pull the wool over my eyes-just going to happen-and they need to know that it won't happen. How many times did you think you parents didn't know what you did and then find out 20 years later . . .oh they really did know-pretty common.

Lol. You really don't have a clue. "Adam, Adam where are you?" "I hide myself b/c I was naked" (i.e. I did something I shouldn't have done and I ran away (I hide myself, I snuck away, etc.) b/c I didn't want to deal with the punishment). It's a tale as old as time and no about of "good relationship" is going to prevent it.

Fat chance segregated troops last for very long. Separate but equal? Not likely. It takes enormous resources to run a scout troop effectively; they won't be separated for long. It's the boiling frog scenario-just look how far scouts has traveled in 4 years and the idea that they will be separate for long holds b/c . . . . .

You didn't even read and listen to what I wrote.

Maybe, maybe not-you definitely haven't lost the war. Some kids like to sneak-I know I did, my siblings did and we turned out just fine-served missions, married in the temple, etc. My parents kept tabs on us through certain methods. Different personalities, different kids. I don't think the battle or the war is lost. There is no feeling like "he has to sneak", it's very simple-kid sneaks b/c he is doing something he doesn't want to get in trouble for and if his parents knew he would get into trouble-unless you've got perfect kids they are going to sneak from time to time b/c they don't want to get into trouble! Adults do it all the time, they sneak around things at work, in relationships, etc. Most of the time the things people sneak about are pretty innocous-but we all still do it. For example who has never done the "boss button" at work. Yes it is immature, yes it isn't responsible, but just about everyone has done it at some point in their adult life.

If it were me, I wouldn't reveal my source at all. While kids these days are very smart, they are also very stupid-stupid as in they try to sneak and skirt the rules and always end up leaving breadcrumbs that a wise parent can see a mile away. You've got to out-fox them-which shouldn't be too hard considering you are much older, more developed, smarter, etc. Yeah, I'd keep this source close to my chest-have the stern talk, drop the hammer and then in a month or so go back to my source and see if anything has changed. For a parent, you've got to protect your sources and methods of getting information about your kids . . .that's why the "a little birdie told me" is beautiful :-). 'Cuz if you reveal them-it is possible if not likely they will go deeper underground and that's not good.

Of course I'd definitely nip this in the bud-if you don't she is in for a world of hurt either fairly quickly or at some point in her young life. I don't think I'd confront her like "so, I was reading in your diary, the other day . . .. . " There should be other ways to get her to open up about this. I highly doubt she is petting with him at school right? Maybe afterschool? I bet you have probably seen the boy somewhere or noticed the difference in her attitude or in the way she talks. How you confront her or get into this topic is really up to you and will depend on the particular circumstances. I'd say, yes communication is the key (but not in the way you are thinking), clear, concise, stern communication from parent to child that this type of behavior is unacceptable and that b/c the child is choosing to engage in this type of activity, some form a discipline is forthcoming. She's not 16, so she can't drive, so how in the world is she even seeing this boy? I'll say this is probably a failure of parenting prior to this occurring. She has got to see him somewhere relatively private and without the means to travel herself, so that means somewhere along the line you are facilitating this activity (in a passive way). So figure out where it is she is seeing him and lock it down. If that means no afterschool activity, so be it. A child who at 15 is petting means she will be having sex real soon if this problem isn't taken care of real fast. Make no mistake, whoever told you not to get involved in this probably don't have well-behaved well-disciplined children and don't know what they are talking about. Now she may choose to have sex, etc. and that is her choice, but you as a parent are there to make sure she understands the consequences of her decisions and the best way to prevent it is to make sure she understands consequences for actions that don't have massive consequences like pre-marital sex.